


Bathed In Blue

by SmartBlackRose



Series: Midnight in the Garden [2]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Hurt, M/M, Mention of Death, Mention of addiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-09
Updated: 2017-05-09
Packaged: 2018-10-30 02:12:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10866858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SmartBlackRose/pseuds/SmartBlackRose
Summary: In the aftermath of Prentiss' "death" and "resurrection", Hotch realizes that he might have ruined the only good thing in his life.





	Bathed In Blue

**Author's Note:**

> Loosely a song fic for Lily Kershaw's Bathed In Blue

The first time I saw you  
I should have known better  
Than to go there 

Reid pressed his hands on the desk of his office and shook his head.

"How could you?", he asked, voice full of hurt and clenched, just like his heart. "How. Could. You?"

He didn't dare look up from his hands, scared of what he would see in Aaron's eyes. When the older man didn't answer, though, he decided it was worth a shot.

"How could you?", he screamed. "It's- You told me she was dead!"  
"I had no choice", Hotch answered quietly.  
"We're done. I'm done putting up with your shit! Ten months! Four of which you ran! You know what you are, Aaron? A mess, a coward!", he shouted. "You were one when we got together, you're one now! We've been dancing through your shit for years! I don't even know you! So we stop, now!"

He pushed himself away from the desk and to the door, anger filling him again.

"Spencer, wait. Please, let's-"  
"No. Fuck you. Fuck you and everything you've put me through."

He left the room and then the house, the sound of the doors slamming lingering behind him. Hotch fell in the armchair and buried his face in his hands. Spencer was right. He needed to pull himself together, to admit that there were things he did wrong and he had to fix them.

There was no going back, now. He'd reached Spencer's breaking point and he wasn't sure how he could help it.

Reid found an hotel room for the night, once he'd stopped driving around DC without aim. Anger was still throbbing in his chest, but it was being slowly smothered by hurt. He wouldn't go back to Aaron. The man had pulled him down all the time, kept him back. It was time to go on his own and forget about him. This had gone way too long, he shouldn't even have let this happen in the first place.

The team broke again, split in two parts. The one behind Hotch and the one behind Reid. Prentiss tried to make herself look as small as possible, but it was obvious she felt guilty and wanted to find a way to fix the couple. JJ backed Hotch and it strained her friendship with Spencer even more. Rossi tried to support his old friend, but he could understand why Spencer had left and Derek, well he was about just as hurt, so he stuck by his best friend.

"I know what you're doing", Spencer snapped, one morning.  
"What?", Hotch wondered.  
"You want to talk. You've found the right thing to say, the way to fix things. Well, no. It's too late. You should have started talking when it was the time. Now go away."  
"Listen, we can't continue like this-"  
"Like two coworkers? Like we should always have been? I don't see why not. But please, please request a transfer if you're uncomfortable."

The word struck Hotch directly in the chest and he shook his head slightly. Spencer had won this one. And he'd keep winning the next rounds. And Aaron started to believe him, believe that everything wasn't fixable with tape and glue, that maybe he'd lost everything.

He took up Spencer's suggestion and put in for a transfer. Nobody knew about it and he didn't intend for anyone to know, either. He had lost everyone's trust and he was more than done with the BAU. His issues wouldn't be anyone else's either.


End file.
